How to Take Dating to the Next Level – Senior Planet
Because, I hate to break it to you, but sometimes you, like, need people. You need to be taken care of sometimes, in whatever way — sexually, emotionally, or even physically, if you get wicked bad food poisoning. And when you're in that situation, if you're in a no-rules, super-chill, easygoing relationship, you won't know if your partner will be there.
That's a terrible burden.
3 Signs It’s Time To Take Your Relationship To The Next Level
Even non-monogamous relationships need rules. You might admit this intellectually, but you're concerned about something else: My response to this is simple. So what if you freak her out a bit? That's actually not a huge problem. Monogamous relationships are scary, complex, intense things.
You're saying, "there's an outside chance we might grow old and die together. And you'll have to just ignore all those other people in your life you want to bone, indefinitely. Being a little intimidated by that is human. That just means you respect the depth of your obligations. If you aren't a little frightened by the intensity of a really good relationship, you're probably a robot. Shout out to my robot readership. Ultimately, if you're not willing to say or do things that might scare your partner, you're never going to get anywhere in your romantic life.
You've got to take courage and be willing to say what's on your mind, even if it's going to rock the boat a bit. Otherwise, you'll never buy property together, or try that weird butt stuff you want to do, or talk about your deepest emotions. What kind of a relationship is that?
Moving A Relationship Forward
Now, maybe this doesn't address your concerns, because what you're worried about isn't violating the hilariously stupid Always Be Chill rule that has somehow been propagated throughout the millennial generation. Maybe what you're actually worried about, deep down, is that she'll reject you, and just cut things off completely. There's a fearful scenario playing out in your head: What I have to say to that is: That's a possibility you have to deal with. This only creates built up resentment and unspoken assumptions - including a world of hurt down the road when your lives have become more blended.
1. You can tell that you and your partner trust each other
If he chooses to rise to the challenge and get on board — great! If he decides to walk away — also great! I guarantee following my 5 simple steps below will help ease your nerves and remove any potential awkwardness that might be coming up for you. If needing a deeper commitment is fear based ie: Does he fit into your life? Have you already introduced him to friends and family members in your inner circle? My recommendation is to have this talk either at your place or someplace neutral — like a restaurant, on the beach etc… Talking about this at his place his cave and domain can be a little disempowering — better to stay on your own turf.
Be Unattached to the Outcome Your goal is to stay anchored in the energy of openness and allowing him to make the best decision for himself. Do NOT present this as an ultimatum or with a crowbar behind your back, coercing him into what you want. Stay neutral and treat him just like you would a friend. Instead, communicating those fears helps to clear up misunderstandings and brings about new perspectives. This keeps the relationship healthy and actually promotes the growth of the relationship.
Everyone has fears and doubts at one time or another. Speaking them aloud will help you both to feel better about the relationship and closer to each other. This article was written by a professional writer, copy edited and fact checked through a multi-point auditing system, in efforts to ensure our readers only receive the best information. To submit your questions or ideas, or to simply learn more, see our about us page: Meet Singles in your Area! About the Author This article was written by a professional writer, copy edited and fact checked through a multi-point auditing system, in efforts to ensure our readers only receive the best information.
View Singles Near You. How to Progress in a Relationship. How to Fix a Relationship on the Rocks. How to Stay Faithful in a Relationship. How to Repair the Relationship After a Breakup. How to Deepen a Relationship. Accessed 16 January Dating Tips - Match. Depending on which text editor you're pasting into, you might have to add the italics to the site name.