Thirty minutes into our date, I found out why…. He had loads of swords and machetes on the wall and decided to hold one to my throat to show me how incredibly strong they were.
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I arrived on the date, all happy, but realized that the girl who sat was a year old lady with two children and was just finding an excuse to leave her house. I was a fan. When we meet up, the wit disappeared. I tossed her a couple of verbal jousts. It turns out her roommate had been helping her reply to messages. Without asking, she reached over and started picking toppings of my pizza. I spent a week messaging a few girls and decided to meet the first of these girls to put my plan into action. We ended up hitting it off and started dating exclusively. Four years later, and we are still dating.
She completely ruined my plan. We went out a few times. A few weeks in, he told me I was almost perfect, except my upper arms were fat. I think he meant it as a compliment. It takes me an hour to drive there, and I arrive at the restaurant before she does a good thirty minutes before our date, so I could be prepared. I always sat at the kids table when I was a child, and it seems nothing has changed for the kids now. But they love it.
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They mess around and eat what they want. We stopped years ago trying for perfection. Sweating in the kitchen for 8 or 9 hours, preparing, cooking, drinking. Oh we all bitch and moan. But we love it. My dad RIP used to sit at the table , while we were cooking our asses off, and say when is it going to be ready? He would hold his fork and tap it on the table. Drove me crazy , but I sure do miss that. Meanwhile, cheese and crackers, chips and dips, veggies all are being consumed while they are waiting to eat.
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This year we are down to 10 people. I feel sad about that. Sure it was always a fiasco when 25 of us got together in one house. New York Jewish family. Quiet is not a thing. And any guests would sit in shock for a while, and then most would jump right in. You wanted to eat, you had no option. But this year Mom and dad are gone, others are not joining us for various reasons. This week a coworker of mine was sentenced to 3 years in prison, 32 years suspended.
And a year probation. He had been under house arrest for almost a year, after spending months in the county jail. Over a year ago, in February , police came to our office building, went into his office 2 doors down from mine ,and 15 minutes later, escorted him out. I was in his office when the state police showed up, arranging a meeting we were going to have that afternoon. I was asked, with merely a look and a nod from one of the officers to leave. I did without needing to be told twice. They all drove away and that was the last we saw of him. The police did return the following day and seize his computer from his office.
Apparently when they had gone to his home with him, they found his home computer, phone and a camera set up in the living room to watch kids play outside and record them. Evidently, they needed all the devices he had access to. And, of course, there were the questions and rumors flying around. No one had any idea. Initially we thought they came and got him because his elderly mother must have fallen ill or, maybe fell down.
Or maybe his alcoholic sister had crashed and killed herself or someone. None of these are good reasons, but child porn was the absolute last thing on our minds. The next day, he was fired. Still no explanation to anyone. We all started searching online. Took a bit of time, but found out he had over 20 child pornography charges. Yes, he was now in the local county jail in the county he had been living in.
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He pleaded guilty to all charges. In the end, half were dropped.
Apparently, he had been perusing child porn sites and the police were doing a sting in the area. Lo and behold, they traced his IP address and found him. My heart went out to his Mom and sister. He was basically their caretaker. Visiting when he could and helping around the house. Claiming false charges, he was set up, I am sure he only looked once, and on and on. It was sad and we needed to give her time to absorb the shock.
I cannot imagine her grief then, and even more so now with his sentencing. A few of us who were closer to him then the rest of the office, were asked by his mother, for a character reference letter for the courts. I agonized over this.
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His moral character was in the gutter at this point in my opinion, but I agonized because I wanted to do it for his mother. She was in pain and thought this would help him. I could not write what a great guy he was and how helpful and caring he was. Not when he is looking at child porn and videotaping children. One person did, but I could not agree to it. I, as well as others who considered him a friend, felt so betrayed.
And more so duped.