How about a universal truth: Here, a few members share both their bad and good dating experiences so you can learn from them.
5 Things an HIV-Negative Person Needs to Know When Dating a Positive Person
Just like that popular dating service, it is just lunch. After the first day or two of chatting, go have lunch. Your post or ad has spoken. Have a conversation—have several conversations—and exchange emails. Listen to the other person. Read what he has written. Dating is not a monologue. There are no bad dates. Even an apparent disaster, a bar encounter at which the other person succeeds in quickly getting drunk, for example, can be useful.
5 Things You Need to Know to Date an HIV-Positive Guy
You will stick to having a cup of coffee by meeting at a cafe next time. Know yourself before you start. Keep the two separate. If you live in a small town in a small state, what percentage of men are gay? What percentage of those gay men are positive or open to dating someone who is positive? At that time I was all about quickies and not really looking for a long-term relationship. I also thought I would only be attractive to someone who was HIV positive themselves, denied by others.
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Yet that turned out to not be true which took some risk of disclosure, but that disclosure affirmed to me that not everyone has hesitations dating someone living with the virus. Sometimes people assume my partner is positive, and I have to correct their ignorance. In that spirit, I would like to share some of my insights of being in a positive-negative relationship with advice for negative individuals who have recently started a relationship with someone positive or considering.
It was once thought that being in a sexual relationship with someone positive carried the risk that their partner would pass the virus to them. Even before PrEP pre-exposure prophylaxis, a daily pill the HIV-negative person takes there was little risk as long as couples were practicing safe sex and using condoms. It is highly effective for preventing HIV if used as prescribed, but it is much less effective when not taken consistently. As people living with HIV, we get sick just like everyone else. Yes, sometimes it may take a little longer to clear up, and other times it might even be so brief you wonder if we were faking it.
But a nice blanket with access to binge watch Netflix may make a difference. Some visits are anti-climatic. Results are usually given as cells per cubic mm.
Respect his privacy.
Viral load tests tell you how much virus there is in your body. If someone is on treatment, viral load tests also show how well the treatment is working. The aim of treatment is to get the viral load to undetectable below 50 copies. If therefore you were referring to your girlfriend as having an undetectable viral load, then this is good.
- I am HIV negative, my girlfriend is positive. Can we have a baby??
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- Dating While HIV Positive.
You mention that your girlfriend is taking meds. Being on treatment and having an undetectable viral load dramatically reduces the chance of your girlfriend passing HIV onto you. In response to your question, it is possible for you and your girlfriend to have a baby without you catching HIV.
There are a number of options available to couples like you.
If you have a question, don't be afraid to ask it.
The simplest option is just to conceive normally. In your partner has an undetectable viral load, you will not be at risk. As with any planned pregnancy it is good to talk to your doctor for best ways to conceive. For example knowing the best times.