No so much the occult, but pure force of will, i.
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Kinda like the Force. But thats just my take. I would strongly suggest not putting ritualistic spells in the forums. You never know who is reading and if someone was ill informed enough to try to the spell based on what you posted.. There is no black magic or white magic. It is the intent of the practioner.
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Assigning good and evil to magic is humanity's way of trying to classify and label every single thing when in actuality you cannot label it. I grew up with stories of demonic possession and many other things I remember once my uncle told my sister and I that he needed to go fight the devil as he was coming to get us, so we needed to stay quietly in the room while he battled him He did all of that so that he could sneak out and get KFC without needing to bring us.
He told us that he had won the battle and got the food to celebrate.
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Of course I think the Op was talking about low magick Ceremonial magick usually includes the invokation of Deity, or Angelic powers Prayer is also a form of magick, as is chanting to intent.. I don't think one can use magick without being affected by it. I remember a post a while back from a young woman who wished to cast a love spell against another's will, knowledge or permission. The same answers were given in there, from a slightly different viewpoint. No malice, just reflection. A mirror works well.
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I've never actually met anyone that has used magick to do harm As the 1st born I was a target to anybody who wanted to get back at my folks for whatever reasons. It is not the magic that is bad but the person trying to use the magic. There is no black magic or white magic.. With all the cross breeding these days, sometimes it will skip several generations and the old blood will come out in someone somewhere.
If you have had a largely western upbringing and you are indeed being affected by these things, then I think you need to get in touch with 'who' you are. That cant be done in places like this. You need to speak to the old ones of your own people who can guide you through the path.
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Right now, with the blood but no real knowledge, you could be like a loose cannon and dangerous to yourself and possibly others around you. Things happening without you really understanding what's going on. Just bear in mind you cannot prove to a blind man that the color blue even exists. Or any color for that matter.
They can intellectualise it, try to understand it, come to some point of comfort that it exists, but in all likelihood will have got it wrong anyway despite their efforts. And thats for those who actually try to understand.
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Its a different set of senses. It isnt something that can be learned. That might not have happened to someone NOT of the old blood. It was something to show you 'who' you are. Did you see it? Those who are, need to learn. It doesnt mean you have to practise evil or harm, but you ARE open to it.
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Then you can protect yourself from others, protect others around you from yourself you cant see it right now and then you can choose. I hope you choose wisely. Good luck on your path. Perhaps the foot-bleeding incident you describe if it wasn't a sliver of glass: I work with glass all day, and spotting a single sliver of it on a perfectly smooth floor is nearly impossible could have resulted from the sort of awe and wonder seeing a temple in person inspires?
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