Phone numbers are attached to a lot more than than just telephones nowadays, and if the wrong person gets ahold of your phone number, none of your options for mitigating that are particularly painless.
Online Dating Boundaries and Giving Out Your Telephone Number
Plenty of people spend their workday in front of a computer, so it wasn't inconvenient. Most people also have a big enough online presence now that some light googling ought to tell you whether or not things smell fishy. If we agreed to meet, THEN we'd exchange numbers for coordination purposes. Assuming that refusing to speak on the phone means there's a secret husband or boyfriend is a pretty big leap, but ultimately nothing is certain.
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I for one actually don't like talking on the phone, but Manti Te'o allegedly spoke to someone he believed to be his "girlfriend" on the phone, and we all know how that turned out. Delete Report Edit Reported Reply. SpacedInvader Send a private message. But the thing, there's always risk when it comes to dating. Think about the time before the Internet. People always exchanged phone 's, that's it. In fact, that was the only options, but the Internet seems to be more of a crutch these days and an enabler to keep people at a distance. Wilde Send a private message.
I agree with you in that there are many reasons why women are reluctant to give up a phone number. All of my dating experience has been live and in person, including meeting. I learned not to give out my phone number to easily because I had a couple of experiences with men who abuse that. I may have seen them a couple of times and it just wasn't working for me and I ended it, but a couple of persistent fellows kept phoning and texting, and even when I block the number, one of them just called on a different phone. Right, but just because it's different, that doesn't mean it's bad or worse.
Most people got by just fine without airbags and power steering, but few would argue that cars are worse for having them. Anything that allows people to live their lives and pursue the things they want to pursue while mitigating at least some of the inherent risks involved is a good thing in my book. When you ended it, did you tell them you weren't interested and wished them on their way? Edited on April 27, at I started with that, and I got harder as the pestering escalated.
HikerVeg Send a private message. It is possible to meet someone without exchanging numbers. One advantage is that you weed out the people who just want to text ad naseum and never meet. You can use the messagung feature on the dating site to communicate till you meet in person. Call me old-fashioned, but I can set up a date via over the phone.
Not much of a texter myself anyway. Must know what they sound like. If they don't give the digits, it usually means they aren't serious about meeting. I speak from experience, every time a woman didn't give me their , they were never were serious about meeting in the first place. Aka - possible cat fishers. I pretty much figured where you stood on the issue based on your original post.
You posted again about one of your female friends who does something unusual about dating. Just trying to guess about her reasons. Did you just want people to agree with you that she is wrong? I agree with you. Most of your female friends make dating hard. George Send a private message. Your friend is on the site tonfeed her ego. Signs in once a week? No one is going to track you with your phone number, no one is going to steal your bank account with just your phone number, and no one is going to appear on your front door with just your phone number.
Disposable numbers are easy to come by and often free to use. Modern day smartphones have a block feature which you can use at your convenience. It is not wise to give your phone number out for online dating regardless of being able to block it if things dont turn out. What you need to do is meet them in a public place and have a few dates first without the number then you will know if you feel comfortable enough around them first.
Another way to vet someone for suitability is to talk at length on the phone and via email if you cant talk long on the phone before you meet them. Some people are very cunning and clever and great actors who say and do all the right things. I usually try to chat on Google hangouts 1st until I get to know them better or really get a good feeling that they are for real…all my friends say i need to write a book on how to tell if someone is a scammer cause i have ther MO down cold!
But if you have a failure, just block the number immediately..
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Thereis a way to get a pass through number using google.. You can also block on hangouts if things go south. So use common sense and trust your instinct when deciding whether or not to give a guy your number. But if you want to communicate outside of the artificial online dating environment and give relationships a chance, of course you have to chat in the real world, and hopefully meet in a safe, public place as soon as you can.
Online Dating Boundaries
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My solution is that I never give out my cell, but if I connect with someone and really like my communications with them, I will take it live by Phone only not video via Skype. Skype is still one-on-one and you can take calls through your computer, but if the person is just, well, creepy, you can hang up and block them from every contacting you again.
“When to Exchange Phone Numbers” — Online Dating Safety Advice
I have to admit I do progress from dating sites quickly onto text or voice. I think you can tell a lot from speaking on the phone first, how the person talks, how you get on when talking. But I like to bring up the point that dating is a gamble no matter how cautious you are. The reality is that if when you open yourself up to another person you risk the possibility of being hurt—both emotionally and physically. The closer you get to a person the more damage they can potentially do to you.
While we may not all admit it I think we pretty much all want this and not simply in a lustful manner. Yet this brings up the very real threat of rape. The difference between sex and rape is a difference in opinion. Meaning that with sex two people share the same opinion: But with rape only one person wants the other while the other does not. Rape takes while sex gives. But this is no way to live. The best thing to do is to trust your instincts.
Use common sense and remember that nobody can force a relationship. Also consider going out on double dates. Though remember some people can be shy.
Fair enough, texting and talking on the phone are great ways to get to know someone, but how often have you wasted chatting with people only to meet them and be disappointed? Why not meet as soon as possible and get it out of the way? No need for lots of messages back and forth.