Dating guys who are friends

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  1. Should You Date Your Guy BFF? The Pros & Cons
  2. That time I ended up dating two best friends — in the same night - Los Angeles Times
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Should You Date Your Guy BFF? The Pros & Cons

I know everyone has their own policy on this, but for me: To be frank, that only confirmed to me that we were better off ending this now. I know a lot of people find the friends first approach more relaxed and organic. I embrace whatever works for each individual! But I have NO doubt that the friends first thing is not for me! To go into a new relationship with an intentionally ambiguous maybe-we-will-eventually-have-chemistry is unsatisfactory, confusing, and unappealing to me.

The good news is that this is another instance where a specific dating experience provided clarity for me. But my personality is more comfortable understanding that this relationship is defined as a friendship and nothing more. Bonnie was off the dating market from when she met her now ex-husband till early He had just gotten divorced after 20 years so I figured he just wasn't ready and that's okay, no hard feelings. He resurfaced in December before I met Guy 2 and finally asked me out after I had been seeing Guy 2 for about 2 weeks.

Bear with me here I have been seeing both of them but only slept with Guy 1 and really only had about 4 dates with Guy 2. Guy 1 knows that I was dating someone else and when we were out the other night, he saw the name of Guy 2 on my phone and low and behold - it is his very good friend!!! Guy 2 actually handled it pretty well and has agreed to let me tell Guy 2 myself - which I'm doing tomorrow because we already have plans to see each other. Guy 2 has said that "we'll figure this out, Guy 2 and I are going to be fine, you did nothing wrong" He's saying all the right stuff but he's not professing his love to me or anything and out of respect for his friend, we have not talked since the other night but he told me to let him know after I've told Guy 2.

What can I say to Guy 2 tomorrow, to let him know that I'd rather be with him, without it getting back to his friend and without even knowing if I have the choice because he may tell me he's not interested anyway? Thanks for any advice on what to say to Guy 2 without hurting either one of them!

Share Share this post on Digg Del. First, dont hedge your bets with people. If you like one more than the other, then youre going to have to take the very real risk of losing both by making this decision. You shouldnt waffle back and forth because you dont want to burn any bridges, its unfair to all 3 of you. The fact that theyre friends shouldnt be a big deal, but you really cant drag this out anymore at all. You have to make a decision, and understand that youre going to be stuck with it. If you dont, then both of them could decide youre playing games and be done with you.

That time I ended up dating two best friends — in the same night - Los Angeles Times

And it doesnt matter who it gets back to, because like I said - you cant hedge your bets with people. Tell the other person you think theyre a good person, but you feel more chemistry with the other person and dont want to waste his time.


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Thats a really honest thing to do, and he'll have a lot more respect for you. Remember, if you BS or make up excuses, he's surely going to tell his buddy, which just makes you look bad. Thanks for the advice and I agree - honesty is the best policy and I would never lie to either one of them. I'm afraid when I tell Guy 2 that I have been intimate with his friend for 2 months, he won't want to see me anymore anyway, even if I do tell him that I see potential with him and would like to continue to date him. What can I say to let him know that I see long-term potential with him and not the other, without hurting either one of their feelings?

Remember, I'm not even sure how this guy feels about me yet Guy 1 was burned in his last relationship. I lost about 30 pounds I was overweight and got in excellent shape. I went 5 weeks without seeing him and barely talking to him. It was difficult and I cried quite a bit but it helped me move on and start to see him less as a boyfriend, more as a friend and lowered my expectations.

In mid-November we saw each other again and went back to seeing each other frequently. I stayed mysterious, went out with other guys hinted that to him as well , we flirted lots more, incorporated sexual humor and so on.

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A few days before Christmas we spent the whole day together, exchanged gifts and ended up making out and having sex several times. I was sure things had changed since then, because he was being different with me, subtly, but more warm and was planning more trips with me. I felt devastated and cried quite a bit. I went on a nice date last night and am trying to keep my head above water. Also, the advice did work to a degree.

Wow I feel for you. What a confusing trippy guy. He sounds hella confused on what he wants. Leave him to wallow in his head. You sound like youre a wonderful girl that any guy would be lucky to have. I have a similar problem and I was contemplating having sex with him even after he said he just wanted to be friends just like you did. I just left you a reply to the comment you left for my question.

I was wondering if you could take a look if you have a minute, thanks!


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Study show if get rid of people that bring negativity in our life good thing will start happenning to us ; So its time he get his box to the left and for you to leave him behind i find one thing about him from all this he is a douchebag ; Feel nothing were you wernt looking good and when you were has no trouble feeling up but he still confused and he didnt mention that before he cop a feel the bastard ; Cut him out girl you are the prize and if he didnt see that its his lose.

Try to be happy for you girl wright a list of all the things you want to do before you die and do them; Do some voletary work ; Go a bookclub or a tango dancing class be happy and enjoy life until a guy who doesnt make sad but enjoy the light of your happiness come.


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And who is not confused of how amezing your are Be a happy human and enjoy your time on this earth and anyone who make you sad is not worth it. He was in a relationship most of the time.

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But he became single the past june. We started talking and got closer and closer. We made future plans. He wants to stay best friends and continue living together. When he got out of his last relationship he said he had plans to hook up with a bunch of girls and be single for awhile.

And he never got to bc he only ended up being with me. He is talking to a different girl now, or atleast sleeping with one.

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I want another chance so bad. I need some advice and how to achieve a other chance. And what to do. I was in the friendzone, then outta the friendzone, now back in it. What do I do? Moving on is too hard. Any advice is very apreciated. Or am I forever friendZoned? Nope you are not forever friendzoned which is great.

This guy being scared of relationships is completely out of your control and a HIM problem. After you get some adequate amount of space, spend a bit more time with him. This is probably a good time to get him to open up about himself however still keep your mystery about you.

You can be open but not too open. Just try to strengthen the bond you have. Also, what really worked for me and my guy is planning fun things together. Try to think of fun things you can do one on one or in a SMALL group and hint at him to do that with you, but casually. What do you think?