She was overheard by them bad mouthing me to her brother and bad mouthing them which she totally denied! We are over but I still question as I write this…could I be so wrong? I just loved her so much and did all I could but was never enough i always felt. I saw her in the playgound tonight, she was very smug and I had arranged to give all her stuff back that was at mine. That through everything I regret so much!! She removed my name from her within two days after Egypt holiday!
Do you think I might have a sociapath as an ex? I have my heart In my mouth as I think of your children. First losing their mother, and then this woman. She clearly has issues. To treat your children in this way is appalling. Their mother only died in I should have put a smiley on the end of my question asking if she is a sociopath because especially after reading on here I have no doubt at all!
It is the only comment I have read here, that has made me feel very sad. Perhaps that was because when this happened to me I was a grieving mother. Which is why the last one faked that his daughters mother was dying of cancer it was all a lie and his daughter was going to have to live with us….
Trust after dating a sociopath | Dating a Sociopath
It is really sad. No care for anybody else except themselves. You need to take time out for you. Your grief was such a short time ago. She sounds selfish and wrapped up in herself and not good for you or your children.
You talk about all of her needs. After what was nothing short of abuse and bullying to my daughter whilst on holiday in Egypt in July, I thought I gave her it both barrels especially on our return…thats a story in itself and was over again. This was the time she admitted she had a problem and would do anything…ie therapy! I also sat her down and just explained to her that my kids have been brought up differently to how yours have, there mum was incredibly loving and absolutely doted on the pair of them, I also said that my daughter craves female attention and could really be so close to you…you just have to be softer with her!
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She said I know and Ill change! It didnt last and over this past month she slowly changed back and started snapping again then reducing my kids to tears! I think thats the hard thing aswell because when my wife died yes ofcourse it was devastaing and a shock, when I saw her gone there was almost instant closure…. I lived with her depression for years and suicide always came up in conversation…what Im saying is that there was always a possibility that this would happen and had no choice to accept and try to build a new life for us.
It was incredibly tough and ofcourse still is, my wifes memory is with me constantly. I guess what Im really saying is that I thought I was ready to love and be truly happy! Thats like a double whammy and hard to accept at the moment!
Recovering from a Relationship with a Sociopath
I am very sorry to hear that you went through something very similar…through reading I have caught bits of your experience but Im not fully aware! Just thankyou for this site, it is a great work you are doing and helpful to so many! Its incredible to me that the spaths are so programmed and predictable, machine like, but only when you see the truth or have expreienced it!
Shes still married and is someones wife.. You can bet they were the instigator.. Getting married knowing you dont love that person breeds only one thing resentment, which is then aimed at the other person through self hate and that emotion is misdirected..
Stage One – Disbelief
Im telling you this man to man.. Im also terribly sorry about your wifes suicide, that must leave you without the ability to completely achieve closure. My feeling is, and I might be wrong, just throwing out a bit of intuition after reading your post…No matter how long you dealt with her depression, and I know how trying that can be, you dont get quick closure when tragedies like that happen to people we Love… My feeling is you are still dealing with that on such a deep level , not realizing it since you might have tucked it away so far you wont let yourself see it… hence why you maybe were blinded to this person you were recently involved with… Take some time for yourself man, hang out with friends, family, etc etc..
I forgot one, Bewildered, you said you were studying psychology, Boundaries are a huge part of behavioral Psychology. Talking to , flirting with and romancing someones wife shows a huge lack of boundaries , as well as a huge lack of empathy for the spouse of that person.
Please man, think about this very hard before you brush it off. Did she divorce her husband or just move out still actively married? Did she show you divorce papers? Christian…I knew her as an old school friend, we chatted about old times and aquaintances!
Stage two – The fog of confusion
I didnt pursue her and actually made it very clear that it was very important that she work at her marriage because I would not come between that! After two weeks of our first meet she had left him, filed for divorce which yes I saw the papers for! She told me that they had been on and off for years which was confirmed by my own mother who knew her!
Boundaries are extremely important in every aspect of life, especially this aspect. I also understand these types of people can con you, reel you in, and convince you what YOU are doing is perfectly fine even if it goes against your better judgement.. Keep your eyes open , your ears, and practice trusting your intuition… She convinced you to ignore Boundaries, and forget about empathy… The devil is very slick…. Stay strong and stay away from her..
Trust after dating a sociopath
Yes Christian a divorce takes a long time to complete! If there are difficulties such as the spouse not wanting one or agreeing to the grounds of divorce then it can take years! Our relationship began when her relationship to him was over…. He moved straight out of there marital home and in no time met someone else who he is still with to this day! He has never been hostile to me and in fact shook my hand on a number of occasions ie Christmas! I almost feel that he was glad to be rid as there relationship was very much on off…. Thanks for your advice, been here before but feel this time things have gone way too far!
Why would she want you to get rid of a tattoo of your wife? You were a widow and she was the mother of your children. Did she expect you to banish their mother from their life?
I have such deep regret but I covered it with a rose which is symbolic to my late wife! I will be getting it altered and also having her name covered up next sat! Cant come quick enough! I feel so ashamed for how I have allowed this and to be controlled! To be honest I have messed up so many times since my wifes death and this is my wake up call!
For a while at least. Someone once said to me. I think that is true. Christian…thankyou for taking the time to reply and you are very much correct! It all is so obvious now but even back then I felt something not quite right in my gut!
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I used to wonder that her marriage was like that because she never really loved him?