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The information was then compared to see how similar or different each pair was and to see whether people in longer relationships had more in common. In a second experiment, the researchers surveyed pairs who had just met in a college classroom setting, and then surveyed the same pairs later.
There was virtually no change in beliefs over time suggesting that if couples go into a relationship hoping to change the opinions of the other it is unlikely to work. However the researchers warn that the quest for similarity in friends could result in a lack of exposure to other ideas, values and perspectives.
No, opposites do not attract
But you can't have only that need. You also need new ideas, people to correct you when you're loony.
The research was published in the Journal of Personality and Social Pschology. Accessibility links Skip to article Skip to navigation. Friday 11 January And the differences in terms of lifestyle don't stop there.
Turner admits that sometimes her partner feels like she's judging him for his unhealthy habits — which she says isn't true — and he sometimes gets annoyed because he feels he's missing out on eating what he enjoys. Despite this, she says that their differences are mostly not a big deal and it's just a matter of compromise on both of their behalves. With more similarities than differences she says they laugh a lot, communicate well and want the same things from a relationship.
I don't necessarily like burgers, but it's nice to share in something that he likes.
Do opposites really attract - and can they make a relationship work?
So is this the norm for couples that have different lifestyle habits? Or is Turner's relationship an exception? She says that we can be attracted to opposite looks, sense of humour, point of view, exercise habits, careers, and personality traits. Despite this, Lishman agrees that, for some, the initial attraction of being different may wear off in the long term if one partner wants to do more of what they like.
She says that this can be the case if lifestyle habits are the differing factors.
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She also notes that opposing lifestyle choices can mean that couples end up spending more time apart than together. But that's not to say that these issues can't be overcome, providing the couples are open to change.