She will belittle you, make you feel guilty and hold a grudge. None of these things will happen mildly. Everything is high drama. They will be blown out of all proportion. Again it is to elevate her and denigrate you.
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Since she doesn't value herself, this is another tool to try at lift herself at your expense. By humiliating you she thinks she improves her position. An insecure woman is not capable of self reflection. Because that would mean acknowledging her limitations and weaknesses. Subconsciously she knows she has flaws but she refuses to acknowledge these. Instead she masks them and denies their existence. When things do not go her way it is never her fault. It will always be the circumstances that were against her, or someone else who sabotaged her.
She struggles to make real progress in life because she can never take responsibility. She never learns from her mistakes. Relationships hold a mirror up to our flaws.
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When the rose tinted glasses wear off and you start to notice each other's shortcomings, conflict will emerge. It's necessary in relationships to some very frank and open conversations about our limitations. These can be uncomfortable but are required for the relationship to grow and progress.
One of the key ingredients to a successful relationship is the ability to see one's flaws and be accountable for them. An insecure girl can't do this. She can't take constructive criticism and refuses to examine her own shortcomings. This makes it impossible to have any productive and honest discussion about the relationship.
Insecure people don't know how to succeed. So instead they love to see other people wallowing in failure. If you have an insecure girlfriend she won't support your dreams. She is much more likely to tell you that your goals are too lofty and ambitious and encourage you to tone them down. People often tell their partners "I can't live without you" as a romantic gesture.
In reality we could all live without our partners if we had to. They might leave us or they might die. It would hurt but life would go on. It is not a pleasant thought but it is the reality. No person ever physically needs the other in a relationship. Secure people understand that they don't need the other person. Even if they have been in a committed relationship for years they stay there by choice not by need. They stay because they want to, not because they have to.
A tell tale sign of insecurity in a woman is neediness.
13 Unmistakable Signs Of Insecurity In A Woman
But not only will she be needy, she will encourage neediness in you. She wants to emasculate you and to make you feel worthless so she can tie you to her forever. She worries that if you don't need her, then you will leave. If you are secure and confident then that is a big risk to her. That's why she has the full range of controlling, demeaning and authoritative behavior to try and get you to conform to her neediness. I often describe healthy relationships as being like a venn diagram. You maintain your individual life but there is a significant overlap. This space that you share is the relationship, the rest of your bubble is your own individual life.
This Is How You Love An Insecure Woman
An insecure woman lacks satisfaction with her own bubble so instead she wants to jump in with yours. The relationship becomes the most important thing in her life and everything else is relegated.
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Her career, her hobbies and other significant people now play second fiddle. Because the relationship means everything to her she abandons everything else and over invests emotionally. It's hard to notice this happening in the early stages of a relationship. You probably only see each other a few times a week and you don't know what is happening in the rest of her life. Plus you are generally so love drunk that you don't notice. But as things start getting more serious pay attention to this warning sign.
A secure woman will maintain a healthy balance in life and while you will be important, it won't be at the expense of everything else. If she dives all in too quickly, then look out. Understanding the insecurity signs is one thing. Dealing with an insure woman is another thing all together.
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Ultimately you have two choices. Decide that the relationship isn't worth it and bail. Or find a way to make it work in spite of her insecurity.
If you decide to stay it's easy to throw your hands up and say it's too hard and not your fault. It's true that ultimately she will have to take responsibility for dealing with her issues.
Why Insecure Girls Struggle To Stay In Long Relationships | Thought Catalog
You can't fix her. But you can sit on the sidelines and grumble, or you can do whatever you can do to handle the situation. I think it is better to be proactive and try and make the best of the situation for yourself. It will help break the cycle of insecurity so you can get back to a happy relationship. Hans van den Berg. She Is Defensive She takes everything as a criticism and jumps straight to being defensive as her default mode. She Is Authoritarian And Controlling In a healthy relationship both partners need to maintain their individual identity.
She Gets Jealous Jealousy is a result of insecurity. She Holds A Grudge She loves keeping score and will hold a grudge forever. She can't forgive because she doesn't know what it means to love unconditionally. She Overreacts She will belittle you, make you feel guilty and hold a grudge.
She Encourages Failure Insecure people don't know how to succeed. Misery loves company and an insecure partner will try and bring you down to their level. Conclusion Understanding the insecurity signs is one thing. Surviving A Relationship with a Narcissist identifies the need for validation as one of the four pillars of narcissism.
Something was definitely wrong. In order to understand Bill's unfortunate situation, one must revert back to his love life. Four days ago, Bill was the man — he spent three days, five hours, 35 minutes, and 23 seconds scheduling the most romantic surprise birthday dinner date ever for his girlfriend Cathy.
Unfortunately, things didn't work out as planned. Cathy is a very insecure woman whose sole mission in life is to prove that Bill — like all men — is a pig who will eventually cheat on her with a better-looking woman. Needless to say, Cathy did a lot of snooping around and before the big dinner date, she accused Bill of seeing another woman.